IC Inbox - Asgard Eventide

[notthedoctor]

"This is Theta! Leave me a message!"

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[notthedoctor]

oh well

i suppose i shouldnt tell you that he blew up the universe too but it's all right. it reset or something like that

it was only once

but yeah he got married so i can be the Doctor now while he stays home with the wife

uh and i probably shouldnt tell you about Rose then

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[beforethewar]

Once is quite enough, don't you think??

I've met Rose. Sort of. In a dream. I know I will someday die for her, but something tells me there's more to it.

Since you're in a sharing mood, apparently, do tell.

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[notthedoctor]

uh you don't want to hear the story about the virgin queen thats not a virgin any longer then

Nine died for her and then Ten burnt up a star to say goodbye and left me there to be him and its all very complicated like Grace was and oh was that a squirrel

where was i?

yeah the Doctor is married now to a lovely woman who is out of time and its a long story too

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[beforethewar]

You deflowered Elizabeth I? Good grief.

Grace was an interesting issue. And then there's Charley. I take it that it was something like that? I figured I'd stamped that part of me down fairly well after Charley left.

I do get randy in my old age, don't I?

Will I be meeting this wife in Asgard? Should I be prepared?

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[notthedoctor]

I better have! i was planning on it and put a lot of thought into it. pretty sure i did.

you learn how to have fun. lets leave it at that. then you lose your mind and start to like bowties, tweed and fish fingers with custard. i suppose it cant be helped. even we have off regenerations

oh yes! shes here. so is the other wife and the, uh, well, cant rightly call Rose a girlfriend since thats more a human thing and i forget who it was that mentioned rory kissing but then he did catch Oswins cold and im not sure what a twice married Doctor was doing with a nubile young girl that got him infected with her cold. and ended up with her on his couch

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[beforethewar]

The OTHER wife?

My life in Asgard has just become much more complicated.

How do I find time for all this free love with a universe to save?

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[notthedoctor]

of course his other wife and then theres Rose with Oswin and then Rory and - did i mention theyre all here? cant wait until you meet them

like i said it got blown up

blown up just the one time but im not sure

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[beforethewar]

Wait. Rory too??

Well I can see now how it got blown up with my future incarnations being neck deep in women...and Rory.

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[notthedoctor]

rory isnt bad looking at all and hes funny

sort of interesting

id snog him

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[beforethewar]

Well, of course. Rory seems like a fine young man. I'm just reeling a bit at how many amorous encounters I get up to in my future.

Wait.

Isn't Rory married?? I think Eleven mentioned a wife that miraculously wasn't one of his at one point.

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[notthedoctor]

he is

dont get too uppity there

Nine is the one who snogs Jack Harkness and Rose

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[beforethewar]

Wait, WHO'S JACK HARKNESS??

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[notthedoctor]

Jack isnt here and hes complicated

he kept me in a jar for a very long time as a doctor detector

cant die now either. its a long story but hes very handsome. another one i would snog. better looking than Rory but Rory is more loyal and i dont think rory is as taken with uh that lower power as Jack is

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[beforethewar]

Good thing he isn't here. There are enough people in Asgard I'll have trouble looking in the eye as it is.

He kept you in a jar? I'm not even sure I want to know.

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[notthedoctor]

i hope he shows up! i miss Jack

i was a severed hand. where do you think he should have kept me?

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[beforethewar]

Well, you never said you were a severed hand until now!

As for where he should have kept a severed hand, I don't know. A jar is as good a place as any, I suppose, if a bit morbid.

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[notthedoctor]

oh

i didnt? i usually tell most people that right away

he was obsessed with the Doctor. waited a hundred years for him and then clung to the outside of the TARDIS as it went through the vortex

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[beforethewar]

And you want to see him again? He sounds mad, and coming from me, that's saying something. Though I'm beginning to believe I am one of our more grounded incarnations.

Anyone else my future self will pick up on this hedonistic tour through time and space that I might meet here and have to try not to look embarrassed in front of?

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[notthedoctor]

of course i do. jack is my friend. he was there for me when the Doctor just let me fall

you could be. eleven does have a strange bowtie and tweed obsession. that cant be good for him or anyone

theres Martha. shared a bed once back when we went to see shakespeare. Mickey. Sarah Jane. Donna. your and her dna got together

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[beforethewar]

"DNA got together"?

Are you trying to use a euphemism I haven't heard of yet?

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[notthedoctor]

no

your DNA and her DNA made me

sort of

its all very timey-wimey

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[beforethewar]

I'm just trying to figure out how the DNA made you. I need to know who else I'll be expecting awkward moments with, should they show up here.

Sorry, but with all you've told me, my mind is gravitating in certain directions that are rather uncomfortable.

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[notthedoctor]

well i wasnt loomed lets put it that way

if she arrives ill let you know

shes a lot like charley. except ginger. and a temp.

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[beforethewar]

That was very helpful. Thank you.

It seems like my life gets a lot more interesting after I'm gone, if that's at all possible. It does seem like a more pleasant kind of "interesting".

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[notthedoctor]

im dead useful. keep telling you Doctors that. just dont drop more hands. not a geko

thats not true